My penis was once in the Guiness Book of World Records. Then the librarian yelled at me to take it out.

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Well, thanks for nothing, people. While I appreciate each and every one of you that reads my humble little blog, I have to wonder why you do. Well, all but 7 of you. I asked for your help, and gave you a perfect opportunity to participate in choosing content for this site, yet hardly anyone decided to use it. I am also shocked and saddened that none of those who chose to complete the poll liked the outer space section the most. And, regardless of the fact that none of those who responded to my request seems interested in the amazing Universe around us, that content will continue. So, the entire exercise was a complete waste of time. I just wish that the same reticence applied when it came to people sending mean comments.

 

…and the dumbing down of America continues. To make it worse, this show will probably actually become popular.
http://pagesix.com/2016/02/22/el-chapos-wife-might-star-in-stand-by-your-con-reality-show/

 

Even if she wasn’t boarding a plane, this seems like a bad idea.
http://www.arcamax.com/entertainment/weirdnews/s-1804919

 

At least he was wearing a helmet. But, if you are planning on going for a speed run, shouldn’t you prepare for a potential crash by wearing leathers? Or at least elbow and knee pads.
http://knuckledraggin.com/2016/02/oh-man-that-had-to-have-smarted/

 

How intelligent people do it:

 

This story should accompany a “Say No To Drugs” PSA.
http://www.modbee.com/news/nation-world/national/article62516797.html

 

Oh, Emma, I could do that for free.
http://www.newser.com/story/221264/emma-watson-i-pay-to-learn-about-sexual-pleasure.html?utm_source=cavemancircus.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=pubexchange_article

 

Japanese split racing. Those wacky people are at it again.

 

I get the feeling former Mexican President Vicente Fox is not a Trump supporter. I love Maria’s face, when her guest swears on a live feed. But, say Donald actually (UGH) gets elected. How, exactly, is he going to force another country to pay for something they didn’t want, and don’t want to fund?
I saw, this morning, on the news, that the candidates (except for Sanders and Clinton) have descended to name calling. Is that the mark of a potential President? “I don’t like him. He has cooties”
http://mic.com/articles/136344/mexican-ex-president-said-he-isn-t-going-to-pay-for-trump-s-f-ing-wall-on-live-tv?utm_source=policymicTBLR&utm_medium=main&utm_campaign=social#.qF2k2FKvh

 

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Then I saw this examination of the possible outcomes of the promise of the wall.
https://m.facebook.com/notes/soren-christian/and-whos-going-to-pay-for-the-wall-a-game-theoretic-approach/10154066883763755/

 

This has got to be a new record for…I don’t know which term is more appropriate, gullibility, or insanity. I would say this was positive proof that too much sun is harmful to your brain, but there are sunnier places on this planet, so it must be something in the water.
http://mic.com/articles/136355/nearly-40-of-florida-voters-agree-ted-cruz-is-might-be-the-zodiac-killer?utm_source=policymicTBLR&utm_medium=main&utm_campaign=social#.0oJ6YvBQL

 

Yes, Maria Duval is a horrible person, but if you actually believe in psychics, I say you sort of deserve to be defrauded by one. I mean how many psychics have ever actually been proven to be valid, and how many have been exposed as fakes? Come on, rubes, wake up to reality? Would you invest in the stock market without doing any research?
http://money.cnn.com/2016/02/24/news/psychic-maria-duval-chapter-one/

 

I find it interesting how, so often, I find these images that are related to, or illustrate, a story I have included.cool-horoscope-zodiac-affect-you

 

How do you live with yourself?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3467779/Woman-arrested-stealing-money-eight-year-old-girl-lost-father-three-siblings-arson-attack.html

 

Interesting how history has not been content to portray ancient people as they actually were.
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/truth-vikings-not-smelly-barbarians-3183358

 

The ceilings of Iranian mosques are extremely intricate, and beautiful.
http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2016/02/the-tessellated-and-elaborately-detailed-ceilings-of-iranian-mosques/

 

Everyone should know about the experiments the Nazis performed on the prisoners at their concentration camps during World War II. Although they were brutal acts, some of them provided useful information. Not saying that excuses them, but what was done was done. The descriptions in this article are quite graphic, so it is best to pass on clicking the link if you have a low tolerance for that type of thing.
http://all-that-is-interesting.com/nazi-research

 

Some people recently decided they had tolerated the KKK for long enough.

 

Let’s see…I live in a dangerous neighborhood. Should I spend a bundle on bullet resistant furniture, or do I GTFO of here! While this furniture may save some lives, the fact that it leaves the windows, and, therefore, humans most vulnerable anatomy, their heads, unprotected, seems like a blaring oversight. I would feel much safer in a high-backed wing chair. Aaaand, scratching Glasgow off the vacation list.
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-35659484

 

I haven’t plugged my friend’s blog in a while. If my regular readers take my advice, I shouldn’t still have to, but there may be some of you who are not yet aware of it. If you appreciate top-heavy ladies, he typically features one or more in each post. When you have finished reading this post, please go check his out.
http://goodstuffsworld.blogspot.ca/2016/02/goodstuffs-blogging-magazine-230th-issue.html

 

Yeah, just what we need, no point in actually thinking, let’s create furniture that harasses us, instead. I check my pockets every time I leave home to make sure I have my keys and wallet. It takes mere seconds, and I have never left either of them behind. Why is it that common, everyday things (like eating cereal, remember the story in the previous post?) are now too much work? It seems that people are headed toward just being a head on a robotic stick, with everything done for them.  Don’t get me wrong, I am all for making our lives easier, but there’s a limit to everything. And what about the nightmare cleaning this structure would seem to be?
http://ted.tumblr.com/post/139006322865/our-new-monday-morning-best-friend-this-smart

 

If you think life sucks, have a look at it from the perspective of a young child. You probably don’t remember being that age, but trauma was lurking everywhere.
http://themetapicture.com/welcome-to-parenthood-let-me-be-your-guide/

 

Flimsy excuse of the day.
http://www.clickorlando.com/news/florida-woman-didnt-want-to-wait-in-line-steals-groceries-from-publix-police-say

 

People you just want to punch in the face.
http://www.collegehumor.com/post/7036053/10-seriously-dick-moves-no-one-should-ever-repeat-again

 

What several different foods looked like before they were domesticated.
http://www.businessinsider.com/what-foods-looked-like-before-genetic-modification-2016-1

 

If you are sailing on the ocean, and see what looks like sand floating on the water, DO NOT  stick around to investigate.
http://imgur.com/a/wHWme

 

As with most “art” installations, this one is pretty much useless, unless the drill cores were given to geologists to study. I am assuming they were not, since the article did not mention it. The fact that it annoyed nearby residents for so long only makes it more useless.
http://www.amusingplanet.com/2016/02/vertical-earth-kilometer-in-kassel.html

 

It must just be that they are all reaching that age, but classic musical artists are still dropping like flies.
http://www.cbc.ca/news/arts/lennie-baker-shanana-blue-moon-1.3467392

 

I agree with Page and Plant’s assertion that there is no substantial similarity between the two songs. While listening to Taurus, I doubt if I would have ever thought there was any resemblance, even the slightest one, between the two, had I not been aware of the lawsuit.
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/thr-esq/plagiarism-lawsuit-jimmy-page-describes-869928

 

While I am very satisfied with the sound quality of my current Sony earphones, I know enough about Klipsch’s reputation that I am seriously considering ordering a set of these. I can’t remember what mine cost, but I am fairly certain it was more than $100. Of course, mine also have electronic noise suppression.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B019P9XW9W/

 

Some people accused me of being shallow, when I broke up with my last girlfriend, for what I considered a selfie addiction. First of all, it was more that she liked photographing her food, and posting those photos on the internet, that was the real reason. The fact that she also made a few racist comments, in the short time we were together, only sealed the deal. But, if we are talking shallow, how about these breakup reasons?
http://www.funsterz.com/2016/02/29/20-funny-reasons-why-people-have-been-dumped/

 

And, if one considers constant selfie takers as being narcissists, and believes the description of a narcissist as having the traits listed in this article, is that the kind of person you want in your life?
http://www.iflscience.com/brain/could-you-be-narcissist

 

This seems like a clear case of invasion of privacy.
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/02/29/business/media/see-that-billboard-it-may-see-you-too.html?_r=0

 

…and you think you have problems with the ladies? This arachnid got a stiffie, but stumbled into some amber and died before he could do anything with it.
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/d-brief/2016/02/02/fossilized-daddy-longlegs-found-baring-its-manhood/

 

There were sharks on Earth before there were dinosaurs. And even before there were trees.
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/respect-sharks-are-older-than-trees-3818/?no-ist

 

Okay, here’s the “cure”: EVERYONE in her community gets together, and communicates with her in nothing but cat noises. “How much is that item?” “Meow” “Can you tell me what time it is?” “Mrow” “Excuse me” “HISSS!” Wanna bet she drops the act in less than a week? Also, how many actual cats have you seen with studs in their lips, lady? That would get you charged with animal cruelty. “It’s also obvious that I’m a cat when I start purring and meowing,” she explains. Yeah, like no one else is able to purr and meow if they are desperate for attention.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/12127067/woman-says-she-is-a-cat-trapped-in-the-wrong-body.html

 

tumblr_ne13a259W81u29lcmo1_500

 

Wild gorillas compose and hum songs while they are eating.
https://www.newscientist.com/article/2078781-wild-gorillas-compose-happy-songs-that-they-hum-during-meals/?utm_source=NSNS&utm_medium=SOC&utm_campaign=hoot&cmpid=SOC%7CNSNS%7C2016-GLOBAL-hoot

 

OOOOH! Stories like this make me so mad! Fortunately, this one had a happy ending.
http://uproxx.com/life/davidson-dog-brandon-turnbow/

 

A dragonfly covered with dew in the morning.
ragonfly covered in ew

 

gbf

 

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picdump-16-01-15-106

 

zb00680

 

Not only do apes have emotions, but one of those emotions seems to be disgust.
tumblr_o343bxUQoJ1sqz6s1o1_400

 

Conservationists in South Africa are infusing a special red dye into the horns of live rhinos. The mixture renders the horn completely useless to poachers attempting to sell it commercially.
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“Now why did this make my human scream and fall asleep?”tumblr_n2ncih552O1t0cscho1_400

 

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smile_6

 

I am curious as to the story, here. Is the donkey a runaway, or is the driver in a real hurry? It does not appear as if he is trying to rein it in.
https://vine.co/v/irAVj5vgEqW/embed/simplehttps://platform.vine.co/static/scripts/embed.js

 

I never thought of it that way, but it makes sense.
tumblr_o34g6aupqh1qjnhqgo1_400

 

When a lot of people disagree with me, but I find proof of my statement.
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Sometimes the smallest thing means so much. I don’t know that he didn’t, but it would have been nice if the hockey player went and talked to the kid during intermission. Or give him a souvenir, like a stick. That would have really made the fan’s day.
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So, you want to be famous, eh? You will be. As “that guy who got beat up by the entire bike race”. Why do you think those cameras were there?
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underpantsERIKKILLOEN

 

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Automated assembly lines fascinate me.
tumblr_o36ebqNm5r1qzft56o1_540

 

cool-quote-optimist-pessimist

 

You have to be really drunk when you are unable to negotiate a speed bump.
funny-gif-drunk-man-speed-bump-falling

 

Yeah, that would only work if she was attracted to him. Smooth move, though.
funny-gif-girl-borrow-pen-kiss

 

Are there a lot of geeks down by the Apple store around midnight?tbr

 

Anyone who would willingly pay $200 for one meal has way too much money. Go to a normal restaurant, buy an affordably priced meal, and give the rest of the money to someone needy.tumblr_nqh0j4JrZI1rs7hm1o1_500

 

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First time in the big city, or how is it that you didn’t know that automatic doors always open in the center?tumblr_o2gjjbj7dB1v82q38o1_400

 

So, Leo did get his Oscar. And the room went wild. I didn’t watch the program, but the best part of it that I am aware of was when Chris Rock took advantage of it to give his daughters’ Girl Scout troop a shoo-in for most money raised.tumblr_o39yb5rD981rupng1o1_500

 

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In case you are not familiar with the controversy, this is in reference to the many racist senators in the U.S. government who have been trying to defeat President Obama’s every move now saying they plan to block anyone Obama tries to appoint to fill the empty position on the Supreme Court, because he is nearing the end of his term in office. So what? He is still the President, and that is within his power. “Let the voters decide” is their excuse.  tumblr_o37i6wkKf11u309cfo1_1280

 

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g f

 

FFS, people, it isn’t that difficult. If you look at the freaking plug, there is a little diagram on the side that faces up. If that is too complex for you, then just quit complaining.
padwuo9

 

cool-common-sense-punishment

 

giphy

 

funny_pictures_of_the_day_12

 

ng

 

tumblr_o3aa9k7y6p1qewacoo1_500

 

OOkayyy…
tumblr_o3bpodR8jK1qewacoo1_500

 

cool-F-22-Raptor-light-rainbow

 

And they all preach peace.cool-map-Bible-action-circle

 

I have the same problem, but my neighbors have added a twist: Every few weekends, it sounds like they are using a vacuum cleaner with a beater bar on their hardwood floors. Extremely annoying. And, as I am typing this, we are into hour two of shouting that I can hear over the program on my TV, and stomping of feet on my ceiling. If it doesn’t stop, soon, I plan to go up and ask to pet the elephant they are training to dance.cool-upstairs-neighbors-conversation-noise

 

So, I put in my earphones, and rocked out to some classic toonage for a few hours. Then I came across this gem. To hell with anyone who didn’t appreciate the music I had been posting. If you don’t recognize real music, just keep scrolling. Let’s see Kanye West, or Justin Bieber come up with ANYTHING that can hold a candle to this.

 

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Maybe it’s just me, but, if I saw that cloud coming, I would run for shelter. Rain water does not have many tanning qualities. Or perhaps this is just another photoshop, meant to deceive.Get-your-sun-while-you-can-1024x680

 

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I wonder how many young people have no idea what this means. If you are one of them, Google Bugs Bunny Opera.tumblr_o3ckh0KNaa1tezz4oo1_500

 

Same here. Google Wile E. Coyote.
tumblr_o34ivlOCJE1qewacoo1_500

 

Scientist James Basinger with a tree stump believed to be among the remains of a 45 million-year-old forest on Axel Heiberg Island in Canada’s High Arctic.
tbt_petrifiedforest

 

All about the Norwegian Spiral Anomaly of 2009.
http://www.universetoday.com/47219/what-was-the-norway-spiral/

 

At the beginning of this post, I mentioned my shock and disappointment that none of the few responders to the poll in the previous post chose the space section as their favorite part of each post. Well, if you don’t find the events in the article at the link amazing, and the astronauts involved as the bravest men who ever lived, I’m sorry, but you are really missing something. And, if you are one of those conspiracy theorists who claims the Moon missions were faked, I officially hate you. Many, many, people witnessed, with their own eyes, 33 humans riding a large bomb off of our planet, during the entire Apollo program. Do you really believe that huge risk and high cost were expended just for bragging rights? If so, is the reason you don’t believe man walked on the Moon because they didn’t bring back any green cheese? As you can tell, I am quite passionate about this subject.
http://motherboard.vice.com/read/john-aaron-apollo-12-curiosity-luck-and-sce-to-aux

 

Astronaut Scott Kelly has completed his one year in space mission, and is back home. Follow the link, and view some of the awesome photos he took of Earth while he was up there. Hover over the right edge of his photo to find the slideshow control.
http://discovermagazine.com/galleries/2016/scott-kelly

 

I love watching Auroras from Earth. I think it would be awesome to view them from above, and amazing to actually move through them.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3463744/A-flight-fantasy-International-Space-Station-flies-eerie-green-fog-aurora-250-miles-Earth.html

 

It seems odd to imagine a planet free floating through space, rather than orbiting a star.
http://www.iflscience.com/space/curious-stellar-object-confirmed-rogue-planet

 

Hubble photographed a dying star.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/speaking-of-science/wp/2016/02/29/new-hubble-photo-shows-a-serene-blue-bubble-in-space/

 

This image shows the Northern part of Pluto. The planet’s North Pole is above and left of center in the frame. The pale bluish floor of the broad canyon on the left is about 70 kilometers (45 miles) wide, running vertically toward the south. Higher elevations are a yellowish hue.
nh-northpolerotatedcontrast1024

 

This image shows the exact location of the pole, for anyone like me, who might be interested.
image_3662_2-Plutos-North-Pole-430x210

 

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A carbon fibre body, and a Mercury Marine boat engine. I wonder what the Mopar purists think of this. I like it.
http://www.supercarsautos.com/1970-dodge-charger-tantrum-with-1650-horsepower/

Update: a few days later, Mopar Muscle featured it. Out of the 20 or so comments, about 1/3 were negative. One suggested adding hideaway headlights, and, yeah, that would be cool.

 

When polite doesn’t work. I suspect they parked there to avoid paying parking fees.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/peoplesdaily/article-3463699/Parking-penalty-China-style-Garage-owner-fed-cars-blocking-entrance-uses-forklift-truck-ROOF.html

 

69 years of Aston Martins. I think the new DB11 is a very good looking automobile.
http://carsthatnevermadeit.tumblr.com/post/140199250862/what-a-difference-69-years-makes-alternating-views

 

Watching this video, I can understand why a lot of people love steam locomotives. Apparently, this one was converted from coal to natural gas, when it was restored, which is why there is no plume of smoke from the boiler.

 

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If this guy didn’t slow to a crawl while he passed these two, he deserved to be dragged from his cab, and knocked down into the water.thumbs_picdump407_107

 

I think they used up their share of luck for the month.tumblr_inline_nmhuvxrypm1trh4ft_500

 

Must be a Chevy fan.tumblr_o36fp4lT7w1tpmgf1o1_400

 

The car guy inside me cringed, when I saw this. Yes, the damage is repairable, but still… 
dumped-sports-cars

 

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“The Needle’s Eye”, Silver City – Clifton Highway, New Mexico State Road 78

 

An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy. He hitched Buddy up to the car and yelled, “Pull, Nellie, pull!” Buddy didn’t move. Then the farmer hollered, “Pull, Buster, pull!” Buddy didn’t respond. Once more the farmer commanded, “Pull, Coco, pull!” Nothing. Then the farmer nonchalantly said, “Pull, Buddy, pull!” And the horse easily dragged the car out of the ditch. The motorist was most appreciative and very curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times. “Well… Buddy is blind and if he thought he was the only one pulling, he wouldn’t even try!” 

 

A man enters a liquor store and asks the seller: What would you advise me to buy for my 25th wedding anniversary?  Dear sir, it depends if you want to celebrate or to forget.

 

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick. So Jill preferred the candlestick!

 

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he leafed through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. “Mama, look what I found”, the boy called out. “What have you got there, dear?” With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered, “I think it’s Adam’s underwear.”

 

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a martini to the amazement of the bartender. When the bartender gives the gorilla the martini, he’s further surprised to see that the ape is holding a $20 bill. The bartender takes the $20, then he decides to see just how smart the gorilla is, so he hands the gorilla on $1 change. The gorilla quietly sips the martini until the bartender breaks the silence. “We don’t get too many apes in here,” he says. The gorilla replies, “At $19 a drink, I’m not surprised.”

 

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions. The old priest suggests, “Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand.” The new priest tries this. The old priest suggests, “Try saying things like, ‘I see, yes, go on’, and “I understand. How did you feel about that?” The new priest says those things. The old priest says, “Now, don’t you think that’s a little better than slapping your knee and saying ‘No shit?!? What happened next?”  

 

A woman was standing in a crowded lift of the hotel she was staying in. When a man got in and accidentally elbowed her in the breast. The man said, “I’m sorry! But if your heart is as soft as your breast, you’ll forgive me.” So the woman replies, “If your dick is as hard as your elbow then I am staying in room 113.”

 

Two buddies, Joe and Bill, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Joe throws up all over himself. “Oh, no, Jane will kill me!”, Joe says. Bill says, “Don’t worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your breast pocket and tell Jane that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill.” So they stay for another couple hours and get even drunker. Eventually Joe rolls into home and Jane starts to give him a bad time. “You reek of alcohol and you puked all over yourself! My God you are disgusting!” Speaking very carefully so as not to slur, Joe says “Nowaitaminit, I can e’splain everything! Itsh not what you thinks, I only had a couple drinks! But this other guy got sick on me… He’d had one too many and couldn’t hold his liquor! He said he was sorry an’ gave me twenty bucks for the cleaning bill! ” Jane looks in his breast pocket and says “But this is forty dollars!” “Oh yea…” says Joe. “I almost forgot! He shit in my pants too!”

 

An elderly couple reaching their 70s are about to get married, but before they say their vows, the woman wanted to talk. She said: “I want to keep my house.” He said: “That’s fine with me.” She said: “I want to keep my Cadillac.” He said: “That’s fine with me.” She said: “And I want to have sex 6 times a week.” He said: “Put me down for Fridays.”

 

Frank was excited about his new rifle. So, he went bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear and shot it. There was then a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said: “You’ve got two choices. I either maul you to death or we have rough sex.” Frank decided to bend over. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Frank soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the black bear and shot it. There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him. The grizzly said: “That was a huge mistake, Frank. You’ve got two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have REALLY rough sex.”
Again, Frank thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it would take several months before Frank finally recovered. Outraged he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the grizzly and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there. The polar bear said: “Admit it, Frank, you don’t come here for the hunting, do you?” 

 

Thanks for visiting. Anything you do, or do not like? Something you would like to see? I do not claim to own the photos posted here. If you see your property here, and want it removed, or if you just have something to say, contact me via the comments section. If you liked what you found, here, please tell your friends. And feel free to use any of it for your own purposes. You might also want to check out my Tumblr page, http://rodzilla-world.tumblr.com/ I post similar content, there, but with less ranting.

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