Dear naps: Sorry I was such a jerk in kindergarten.

umtyrt

 

In case any of you are becoming tired of seeing the same header pic, I found a new one to use. Hope you like it.

 

In my previous issue, I stated that I was retired. Well, that changed, this week. On Monday, I was hired as part of a crew of warehouse workers. It is not a great job, and doesn’t pay really well, but it gives me something to do during the day, and a bit of exercise, as well. After sitting on my ass for the past few years, I just hope it doesn’t also kill me.

 

All right, let me be very clear about this: I am NOT against private gun ownership. I am against IRRESPONSIBLE gun ownership. I have clearly stated, many times, that there is no valid reason for any person who is not in the military to own an automatic weapon. So the gun nuts who sent me unkind, and, in one case, threatening, comments can please just back off. I am not advocating that anyone take away your precious firearms. Not the ones that have a defensive purpose, anyway. The only purpose automatic weapons have is to kill large groups of humans. That is the reason mass shooters choose them.

 

This is definitely the first case I have ever heard of where a random armed citizen has intervened in a crime. I am sure I would remember it, if I had heard of another.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/7-eleven-customer-shoots-attacker_us_56e6e63ae4b065e2e3d68d3e?hpcrime=y&te=Newser

 

It amazes me that, with the amount of devastation wreaked upon this area from the air, foot soldiers still had such trouble taking it back from German troops toward the end of World War Two.
http://www.amusingplanet.com/2016/03/the-crater-ridden-cliffs-of-pointe-du.html

 

Well, this clinches it. I am a Trudeau supporter. Good news for old fellers like me.
http://www.ctvnews.ca/politics/budget-will-return-retirement-age-to-65-trudeau-1.2821123?hootPostID=56b5b3528d1802811a19b51a4376ef4c

 

So, March 13th was apparently National Chicken Noodle Soup Day in the U.S. Not that I need a reason to eat chicken noodle soup. In case you want some ideas:
http://foodffs.tumblr.com/search/chicken+noodle+soup

 

I’m guessing this is how I seem to people like guy that banned me from his Facebook page. Their complaints are fair enough, I guess, but do they really matter? Reese could have made a jagged edge on these candies easily enough, though, to more closely resemble actual trees. Still a lot of difference (to me) between a blob not resembling a tree, and totally screwing up the spelling of an automotive name when you are running a blog devoted to vehicles. Or posting unusual images without any context. Whatever. I’m not likely to change my stripes very soon.
http://asspower.tumblr.com/post/141109598126

 

I was in the store on Wednesday evening, and, in the next aisle, was what had to be the most patient Mom on Earth. Her son was either testing her, or truly felt he deserved pretty much every item on the shelves. There was a constant “Can I get this?” from the kid, and the answer was always “No.” Inevitably, the kid would ask “Why?” And SuperMom never once replied “Because I said so” The answers were “You don’t need it”, “You already have one”, “It costs too much”, or something similar. After what must have been the 10th request, I was in awe.

 

Maybe everyone should just not purchase clothing that has been made in foreign countries. Regardless, it might be best to wash new garments before wearing, just in case.
http://www.bookspen.com/2016/03/15/medical-information-everyone-must-read/

 

While these people are sort of being jerks, I can’t help but find this funny.
http://www.funnyordie.com/slideshows/98ca671b76/simpsons-fans-are-trolling-local-news-outlets-desperate-for-exclusive-content/?_cc=__d___&_ccid=90e8221d2392debc

 

The charges are obviously trumped-up, but shouldn’t someone have reminded these students that “Best Korea” has zero sense of humor, especially when it comes to U.S. citizens? Maybe someone did. 21 year olds are not known for the way they listen to their elders.
http://www.edmontonsun.com/2016/03/16/north-korea-court-sentences-us-student-to-15-years-hard-labour

 

STFU and take off your silly hat, moron. You are NOT special. Well, maybe, in the mental health definition of the word. If you will take the hat off at a funeral, you can do the same for your government. And taking this to the Supreme Court is a waste of public servants time and tax dollars.
http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2016/03/11/ken-egilsson-hat-drivers-licence-alberta-license_n_9434574.html?utm_hp_ref=canada-alberta&ir=Canada+Alberta

 

funny-someecards-1

 

How does that old saying go? “When at first you practice to deceive…” 
http://joannecasey.blogspot.ca/2016/03/girl-doesnt-jump-off-with-rest-of-family.html

 

I hope this asshole is quickly found, and sent to jail. Some inmates take great pleasure in teaching a lesson to people who endanger children. While this guy is no Jared Fogle, imagine wondering if your child ate treats bathed in some lowlife’s pee.
http://www.kelloggcompany.com/en_US/socialk/video-investigation.html

 

This article asks a very good question. The answers it gives are disturbing. It seems as if the right people aren’t interested in a solution, and those who are, are drowned out by the arguments from the other side. Keep scrolling past the end of the article for interesting related stories.
http://boingboing.net/2016/03/15/why-isnt-silicon-valley-tryi.html

 

Perhaps, if this kind of thing was done more often, people would stop defacing themselves. The miserable old man in me thinks these kinds of things are useless and look stupid. But, where is the ring in the final photo? I thought, perhaps, it was taken by someone else, and the others were selfies, but the ring should have still been visible, either way, shouldn’t it?
http://topratedviral.com/2016/guy-seriously-angry-after-someone-snuck-up-locked-padlock-to-ear/1001172

 

“Survival Tip” How to make fire with a lemon. Oh, yeah, you’ll also need to be stranded in the wilderness with the lemon, several zinc nails and copper paper clips, plus some wire, and tissue paper. You know, standard items every backpacker carries. Better just carry a good lighter, genius.

 

If you are interested in how things work, this site provides animations that can explain them.
http://animagraffs.com/

 

A massive sinkhole in China has developed its own ecosystem.
http://designyoutrust.com/2016/03/mysterious-sinkhole-develops-a-surprising-and-beautiful-ecosystem-in-china/

 

This story boggled my mind.
http://www.arcamax.com/currentnews/newsheadlines/s-1808656

 

So did this one. I read it twice, and still couldn’t understand why a country would build a power plant that was powered by a material they didn’t have enough of. Especially when that material wasn’t exactly in great supply in the rest of the world, either.
http://www.iflscience.com/environment/british-power-stations-are-burning-wood-us-forests-meet-renewables-target

 

It seems that those rumors about hidden chambers in King Tut’s tomb have now been proven.
http://bigstory.ap.org/c75da8d9a55a473e85b9f8b26feadf2b

 

This is a very ambitious, and impressive, construction.
http://www.thisiscolossal.com/2016/03/cuyperspassage-pedestrian-tunnel-amsterdam/

 

If this wasn’t such a totally stupid, and useless thing to do, I might have watched the video to find out if there was a logical reason for it. Plus, the article explained that what happened was perfectly natural.
http://www.iflscience.com/physics/why-molten-copper-bouncing-bic-mac-burger

 

Not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer.
http://kron4.com/2016/03/14/police-woman-flashes-officers-crack-pipe-falls-from-bra/

 

How did people like Babe Ruth and Hank Aaron ever become good at baseball without electronic shortcuts? My answer: Talent and practice. I guess I am just old-fashioned, in that I don’t see the need for “smart” devices like this.
http://www.zepp.com/en-us/press/zepp_Mike-Trout-Revolutionary-Smart-Bat-Powered-by-Zepp.html

 

Now this is the type of tech that I can appreciate.
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/sentri/sentri-the-hoodie-reimagined?utm_source=kickbooster&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=xdniv6fn

 

I agree with most of what Gene Simmons says in this interview. Especially the part about wishing rap would die. The modern rap, that is. I don’t mind a lot of the original rap music, back before it was all just swearing and about bitches and hoes. When they still wore their pants around their waists.
http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/gene-simmons-skewers-pop-charts-is-looking-forward-to-death-of-rap-20160317?page=2

 

This is the best animal related news I have read in a while. Proof, I guess, that, if you (animal rights activists, in this case) believe in something, don’t give up. You can make a difference.
http://mashable.com/2016/03/17/seaworld-ends-orca-breeding/?utm_cid=hp-hh-pri#XC4WlQr_S5q6

 

This seems like a very effective way of bringing attention to declining bee populations. Mobilize the kids, who will, in turn, harass their parents into doing something about it.
http://www.popsci.com/buzz-is-disappearing-from-honey-nut-cheerios-boxes

 

I’m pretty sure that, if you have a dog, it will love this toy.
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/322583566/hurrik9-the-100-foot-ring-launcher-for-dogs?utm_source=kickbooster&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=f6vwaqfr

 

Now why would anyone take the adult dogs to a shelter and keep the puppies? It is obvious that they needed each other. Some people are just cruel and unfeeling.

 

I am not real familiar with cats, but I have never seen one run around and play like this.

 

Baboon has mind blown by a magic trick.

 

Let’s say 99%, because I did see the dog right away, even though the photo was posted in such a small size that it was hard to read the caption.untitled

 

The first time this puppy encountered a step down.
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https://vine.co/v/eQmm3OuTB6Q/embed/simple

 

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https://vine.co/v/iwd2a23EUwL/embed/simple

 

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“I keel you!”daily_gifdump_1021_20

 

What a male peacock looks like in flight.
peacock

 

spring_faark

 

6f7ecddd41eab7020790586647539c4b

 

Entrance to a subway. The shape is that of a German tramway car, depicted as emerging from underground in Bockenheimer Warte, part of the Frankfurt Metro line.
Entrance to a subwaysubway2

 

Which way does the figure appear to be spinning? Can you mentally make it appear to change direction? It is possible for most people to do, if they concentrate.6b0c8b4615aeb299396a1782f3657a20

 

cool-name-black-woman-spelling

 

OK, ladies, No. 1, always wear your seat belt when a vehicle is in motion. No. 2, your entire face coming off in an accident is wrong.
hnfg

 

When your local rats are so large that they clog your toilet, it is time to flee the neighborhood.
The-reason-for-the-clog

 

ABORT MISSION! ABORT MISSION!
tumblr_o04nrz4dlA1sk3f5oo1_1280tumblr_o04nrz4dlA1sk3f5oo2_1280

 

If any of you are impressed by dumb shit like this, here you go. If you want to risk your life, go ahead, but don’t expect me to cheer when you don’t die, or mourn you, if you do.
big-jump-in-air

 

I guess I better learn how to be very handy.
zb01008

 

I should probably not comment about American politics, being a Canadian, but what happens in this election will definitely affect not only Canada, but the world.tumblr_o41xulrQxT1s4h8gzo1_400

 

I wonder if the two items were related.
hospitalbed_riggo

 

zb01007

 

Clean-and-sober_small

 

Feel-Better-Naked

 

The theme, here, will be “You thought that was a good idea?” OK, the first two aren’t so much a fail as just an OOPS!
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,uyj

 

hea2da62f

 

kty

 

ntbf

 

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This one could also happen to anyone, but he really should have used two or three planks.. tumblr_nlw8v69sq21qhzitko1_400

 

tumblr_o45rmc0bD91ubtb93o1_250

 

 

u,mygn

 

uytrjhe

 

ytngt

 

I LOVE BOOZE

BOOZE LOVES ME

HOLY SHIT I HAVE TO PEE

I’M SO SMASHED I’M ON THE FLOOR

ALCOHOLIC DINOSAUR
ouiymh

 

iyu,myt

 

Lets pick on smart phone addicts for a while.jko.ljkm

 

yuty

 

jmgh

 

How to make your mother proud of you. First of all, I would rather not know that my mother has an itchy asshole.tyrhe

 

thr

 

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copy-cats_small

 

utrh

 

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Good Grief! What is the point? Starved for attention? How would he deal with the metal detectors at the airport? Oh, right, able to afford a plane ticket? HAHAHAHAHA!
funny-people-weird-images-world-pictures-fun-bajiroo-photos-54

 

Curiosity caused me to look up prices for eye shadow, to see what kind of hardened criminal this was. Here, in Edmonton, it goes for $20 to $50, so she took 5 to 7 packages of the stuff, depending on its value, there. It’s a bitch when yo man don’t give ya no allowance fer beautifyin’.
cool-mugshot-woman-eyeshadow-robber

 

How does one fail so spectacularly, and not realize it? Did this woman live alone, with no one to be her conscience? I suspect stockings don’t last her very long.
tumblr_o45laqJphu1qjnhqgo1_1280

 

cool-stealing-food-fridge-Jigsaw-game

 

gnf

 

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tumblr_o43iiy543E1tjjzxpo1_400

 

An Iceberg in Pleneau Bay, Antarctica, showing some odd natural erosion.Iceberg-in-Pleneau-Bay-1

 

Designer Alexander Chapelin has created these tables made out of marble, resin and wood. He’s combined the materials to emulate a topographical image of an imagined shoreline. Multiple layers create a translucent effect with hues of dark blue, aquamarine and more.
2-90

 

This armchair was carved from one tree stump.
0-28

 

The latest mission to Mars intends to search for signs that there may be, or have been, any living organisms on the planet. Another site that hijacks the article with a full screen page over that asks you to sign up. It took a while to notice the X in the upper right which gets rid of it.
http://futurism.com/exomars-mission-find-life-mars-begins/

 

NASA is planning to light a huge blaze in an empty cargo ship to try to learn more about how fire behaves in space, and decide how to design safer manned vessels.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/nasa-to-ignite-giant-fire-in-space_us_56e9f30be4b0b25c91846c36?

 

Those unexplained bright spots on Ceres have become more mysterious.
http://www.eso.org/public/news/eso1609/?lang

 

If you see a post claiming to contain a Hubble Telescope photo of cosmic ice sculptures, please call bullshit on it.
http://www.slate.com/blogs/bad_astronomy/2016/03/15/cosmic_ice_sculptures_photo_debunked.html

 

What does happen to matter that is captured by a black hole when it reaches the end of its life? No one knows for sure, but there are theories.
http://earthsky.org/space/what-happens-to-its-stuff-when-black-hole-vanishes

 

mhngtr

 

I’m just going to assume this is a multiple exposure of lightning strikes during a storm. Once again, Google reverse image search was no help in identifying it.
tumblr_nlocfaiuAi1tlljfxo1_1280

 

The night sky without light pollution in the Atacama Desert, Chile. The structures are observatories, which were built there to take advantage of the darkness, and the extremely dry atmosphere of the site, which is on a plateau between the Pacific coast and the Andes mountains. Some areas have not seen rain for 400 years.The night sky without light pollution in the Atacama Desert, Chile.

 

A visualization of the difference in size between the current Hubble Space Telescope and the upcoming James Webb Space Telescope.
tumblr_o43b8vft5C1ri1icuo1_1280

 

The auroras took the shape of a Phoenix in this image, which was captured close to Reykjavik, Iceland, last September.
PhoenixAurora_Helgason_3130

 

Very, very, nice!
http://bangshift.com/bangshiftapex/ebay-find-this-1963-buick-wildcat-is-pure-classy-1960s-perfection-amazing-car/

 

ISIS is planning to use autonomous vehicles to deliver bombs.
http://www.autoblog.com/2016/03/15/isis-terrorists-bomb-self-driving-cars-sxsw/

 

This tree did not just crush a lovely car. It also crushed the dreams of the owner.
http://dodgeforum.com/articles/an-awful-day-for-a-fellow-mopar-lover/

 

Without the custom paint, wheels, and suspension modifications, I doubt if this vehicle would get a second look. All I know is that the car appears to be Russian, since most of the search results that were returned were in Russian.tumblr_o3ycn1F3P51v4e4buo2_500

 

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1935 Pontiac with trailer towing conversion.1935 pontiac

 

I’ll bet you can’t do that again!
car-hung

 

It’s called the S mode evasion maneuver. Fortunate that the truck driver had quick reflexes. Lucky that the trailer stayed upright. That guy in the van probably feels very relieved as well, now that he has had time to change his shorts.
Like-a-snake

 

Oh, man, I would love to have this collection in my garage.
tumblr_o419ydD5tp1ujn2zao1_1280

 

Or even this one.

 

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Someone has the beginnings of a very nice ride.
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      Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his mistress found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep. I don’t know what’s more embarrassing, having your mistress find out you’re married, Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis, or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

 

Darling,” cooed the wife sweetly over morning coffee, “do you remember those trout you spent two weeks fishing for back in April?” “Sure,”  mumbled her husband through his newspaper. “Well,” she continued, “one of them called last night to say you’re going to be a father.”

 

Sadie had been widowed for a few years and very lonely, and finally consented to going out on a date with Morris, the gentleman her daughter fixed her up with. Morris picked up her and they went on a picnic in a very secluded spot. 
Morris also had been widowed for a long time and found himself very attracted to Sadie, and despite her resistance at first to his advances, he finally was able to make love to her. Sadie was mortified at her lack of self-control and sobbed “I don’t know how I can face my daughter, knowing in a time of weakness, I sinned twice!” Morris said “What do you mean “twice” we only did it once?” Sadie looked at Morris and said, “…Well, you’re going to do it again, aren’t you?”

 

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, ‘When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah’. The teacher asked, ‘What if Jonah went to hell?’ The little girl replied, ‘Then you ask him.’ 

 

Celibacy can be a choice in life, or a condition imposed by circumstances. While attending a Marriage Weekend, Frank and his wife Ann listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.” He then addressed the men. “Can you name and describe your wife’s favorite flower?” Frank leaned over, touched Ann’s arm gently, and asked, “Gold Medal All-Purpose, isn’t it?” And thus began Frank’s life of celibacy.

 

A Preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation. No one wanted him to leave. Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the City stands up and Proclaims, . “If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!” The congregation sighs in relief, and applauds. Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and investor, stands and says, “If the Preacher will stay on here, I’ll personally double his salary, and also establish a foundation to guarantee the college education of all his children!” More sighs and loud applause. Sadie Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, “If the Preacher stays, I will give him sex!” There is total silence. The Preacher, blushing, asks her, “Mrs. Jones, whatever possessed you to say that?” Sadie’s 90-year-old husband Jake is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand, and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies, “Well , I just asked my husband how we could help”, and he said “Screw him!”   

 

A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. “Wow!” said her father, “That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?” “Wrong number,” replied the girl.

 

“This week, at the big consumer electronics show, in Las Vegas, Apple unveiled their first combination iPod and cell phone. They say their goal is to create the most annoying person ever to sit behind you in a movie theater.” –Jay Leno

 

Teacher: Maria, please come to the front and point out America on this map.
Maria: Here it is.
Teacher: Very good. Now, class, who discovered America?
Little Johnny: Maria.

 

Thanks for visiting. Anything you do, or do not like? Something you would like to see? I do not claim to own the photos posted here. If you see your property here, and want it removed, or if you just have something to say, contact me via the comments section. If you liked what you found, here, please tell your friends. And feel free to use any of it for your own purposes. You might also want to check out my Tumblr page, http://rodzilla-world.tumblr.com/ I post similar content, there, but with less ranting.

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